What's it all about Alfie?

Isn't it interesting how a person can be all alone even in a crowd? Sometimes a person doesn't feel alone when they are by themselves. But they really notice it when in the midst of a crowd.

Christianity calls us to be brothers and sisters in community....we are after all, the mystical body of Christ. So, why are so many people in the church alone? This is what I'm thinking about tonight. Are parishes too big ? Are families so private that they don't notice that some of the people in their parishes are alone and don't feel like part of the community?

51% of Americans are supposedly single due to divorce or because they are widowed, or because they have never married. 51%. That is a lot. Yet most homilies don't address this. Yes, we have to be focused on family because that is what God wants us to be - a family, but the reality is that families have been in crisis for years.

What are parishes doing to foster a sense of family and community? Yes, we all go to Mass and we all sit under one roof, and we all give the superficial sign of peace when it is time. But after Mass, everyone gets up and leaves. Families stick together. People in established cliques within the parish greet each other. But look further...there are people in the church that get up and leave without anyone noticing.

The Catholic church, as wonderful as it is, and as much as it contains the fullness of Truth, is not great at being a very friendly church, at least in America. This is one reason that people leave the church and why a lot of the little non-denominational churches are filled with disgruntled Catholics. The little churches know how to be friendly and know how to welcome. Imagine if we Catholics were as loving and warm and welcoming COMBINED with the Fullness of Truth - we would have an awesome communtiy and we would change the world very quickly. This is what I think anyway.

So how are we going to fix this? This is my quandry. I want to help fix it. But right now I am one who is not feeling like part of the community. I am just waiting and praying. I have no power. I have no official helping role. I am outside of the circle looking in. As I write this, I don't have the guts to step out and be my usual friendly self within my own parish, for reasons I won't go into here. I am working on it and I think that soon I will have my courage back. I am feeling stronger every week. But for now I sit and talk to my beloved Jesus, Mary, the saints, the angels, and I wait and I pray. I'm trusting that Jesus will work it out and give me the grace I need to make a difference - to bloom where I am planted, as they say.

Maybe Jesus doesn't want me to do anything but sit in the pews for a while? Maybe he wants me to be "fallow land" for a couple of seasons. I am trying to be patient. I see so many needs and I have so many ideas and I can do so much. But for some reason, I have to wait, so I am.

Time will tell. Maybe a real parish family will never happen for me. Maybe I will just have to sit on the sidelines for the rest of my life - without a bio family or a parish family. I guess if that is what happens it is God's will and I have to lift up all the feelings around this and be accepting. Maybe this is how God is going to make me a saint? But, regardless, I will always have my Heavenly family around me when I pray. Since they are the ones I will be with in Heaven ( hopefully I will go there someday ), I guess it is good to hang out with them now, as well as later.

So, these are my thoughts for tonight. I don't mean them to be depressing, but it is just what is going through my mind tonight. It is an interesting church topic and personal topic for me.